Home › Forums › What’s New on Ickonic… › Tell us a bit about yourself, how you began to awaken
Tagged: awakening, cv, status quo
Well, I’ll make a start! 😉 I live in North Oxfordshire near Banbury with my partner Martin and our cat Lulla and tortoise Tim. I didn’t actually start to realise what these ‘parasites’ where up to until the convid nonsense and feel grateful to Martin and David Icke and all at Ickonic for getting aboard the awakening process. I say awakening, because every time something comes along and I think well that’s a bit out there, I find out it’s got a whole lot of truth to it. I don’t know about you guys, but sometimes the ‘landscape’ of this madness is a lonely space and we don’t actually know anyone near us or any of our friends or family that feel the same as us. How do you cope or maybe some of you have been awake since the day you were born and not conditioned by these maniacs. The world (whichever shape you believe it to be) is feeling more and more surreal and I’m constantly curious and searching for answers and knowledge. There’s a whole bunch of rabbit holes to fall down that’s for sure! I can’t believe that at the tender age of 66 (don’t start with that number 😉) that I’m only just beginning to ‘see’ and understand stuff. It bends your melon a bit, and have to be honest it’s taken its toll on me mental health a wee bit! Especially during 2020 when my Mum was in a care home, and passed away in there all alone, because of the insane restrictions. Somehow I can’t get past the anger I feel about all that and the guilt. So, that’s a bit about us, it would be great to hear anyone else’s story and a bit about you if you like? All the best and stay curious and courageous! Iove Trish x
Hi Trish, here we meet again 😉 thank You for writing a bit about Your awakening process. I d like to share mine too. I can imagine how You both feel – being the only ones in Your area who have begun to question everything. It s hard. Loneliness sometimes hurts really deep – even if it s all an illusion because we are all part of one consciousness as David says (and Miss Saigon, too, Grüße an dieser Stelle 😉). As a human it hurts having no one else around to share all the deep experiences and to support each other – I think about what to write here and will do it in a few days I think. (sorry for any mistakes, English is not my mother tongue but German…) Good night
Hello @N! Great to see you here, and would love to hear about your experiences ‘waking’ up.
it can indeed be an isolating lonely place especially when so many have no idea what’s going on. On the other hand a lot of people are coming round and understanding especially that most politicians are not your friends!
Hey Trish, hey all,
Here’s is my awakening story.
I’ve always felt different, like a piece that didn’t quite fit the puzzle. Something was off, but I couldn’t name it. That changed in early 2025 when the Pakistani grooming gang scandal exploded across the UK. The sheer scale of the cover-up hit me like a freight train. I’d sensed the rot before, but now it was undeniable.
I regret not trusting my gut sooner. In 2020 I remember questioning the lockdowns and being angry with how they were destroying so many lives. But for whatever reason I decided to go along with it, as all my family, friends and work colleagues all went along with it. My wife pushed for the COVID jabs so we could travel abroad. I caved. Looking back, I believe the Creator spared me—my shot was likely saline, a placebo. No side effects, no regrets on that score, but the deception burned. The government’s refusal to investigate the scandals, the blatant corruption—it all started to unravel.
I was a Reform UK member, hopeful for change. Then Andrew Bridgen revealed Farage had warned him to stay silent on COVID if he knew what was good for him. That was it. I tore up my membership. Anger pushed me toward the far right for a moment; I nearly joined Tommy Robinson’s protest in February. Thank God I didn’t. I see him clearly now—a pied piper leading good Brits into division and chaos.
Then David Icke re-entered my life. I was aware of David’s work but I think the reptiles were a step too far for me back then. I can’t recall exactly how—maybe a random video or post—but his book *The Trap* stopped me cold. I devoured it, got sidetracked for two weeks diving into the Bible, hungry for answers. Religion’s gatekeepers hate questions, though, so I returned to Icke with fresh eyes. Finishing his trilogy cracked something open inside me. A new perspective bloomed.
Since then, I’ve lived for the truth. I research the cult behind it all, chase spirituality, and do whatever I can to wake others. The cost has been brutal. My family think I’ve lost my mind. My wife divorced me, took our two young kids. I see them when I can, teaching them to question everything, keep an open mind. I hand out 25 copies of *The Light* truth paper each month, planting seeds.
I’ve lost almost everything, but I’ve gained wonder. My worldview flipped 180 degrees. The Earth isn’t a spinning ball—we’re special, created with purpose in a realm of infinite possibility. The future excites me.
For anyone starting this path, begin with David Icke. Then Max Igan, Jeff Berwick, James Corbett, Derrick Broze, G. Edward Griffin, Guy Anderson. The list grows, but the message is the same: question, research, awaken. The truth sets you free—and it’s worth every sacrifice.
Hello @John, thanks so much for your account of how you got here and criky you have been through so much during the convid period, I really take my hat off to you. The strength you have to keep going despite all your setbacks, shows what a top bloke you are and I wish you all the best.
like you I follow David his lads and the team of course but it was Max Igan initially and currently following Guy Anderson, he’s an exceptional chap in my book.
We can’t unsee what we have witnessed and still witnessing and some part of me thinks how it would be to have not found out all of this . But I’m glad I have and with wonder and curiosity will continue down the bunny holes LoL!
All the best!! 😎😊
Hallo Community! – long story has to be told in a long way – said my psychotherapist 😉
So – In the beginning – there was the word – and the word became also a name – so –
I name myself as Miss Saigon (Experience) in the Matrix Simulation – Miss Saigon was a thought I had initially via House of Money Heist –
where they use Names of Cities. But in this my name has another meaning too – as I MISSED TO BE GONE (in German – I wanted to be gone – also SEI – oder eben SAI –
as vocals are always interchangable (not only for Asperger Authists ;- – but also in general in terms of Etymology etc – like the tower of babylon and the confusion of
languages) a couple of times – so once I had in mind – I should take it as a Name – miss(ed) sa(e)i (be) gon(e). – hope you get it 😉 and I explained it properly …
I was born in Spring of 1971 and raised at the country side (Lower Austria) about 60 k from Vienna. From the Beginning – I felt strange in a Strange land …
Never wanted to read little children books.
The first books I liked to read, were from youth Literatur at that time – Myth and Legends about gods and heroic heroes.
First Ilias, Odyssey, Hercules, then later also King Arthur, Parceval and the Search for the (w)holy Grail (also a theme of finding truth and also finding conciousness
or blue blood etc – different meanings at the same time) Nibelungs, Dietrich of Bern etc all that stuff.
I was a complete dyslexic – but was hard trained by my mom, to get on in school – it was very hard – but in the end I had good progress …
When I was about 14 – I asked my parents – if they can garantuee and show me – that there are other real people rather then me alone –
because – I could perceive them, I saw and heard them, but does anything outside of me also exist – and where is the proof –
maybe it was only an illusion of my mind – like in TV – and then I also came accross the simulation thing my first time –
as I saw on our TV Screen – and I saw a TV on the TV – but maybe there would be an endless Chain of TVs –
maybe I was a being watchig TV and in this TV seeing a boy watching TV and in that TV seeing a boy watching TV – and on and on and on. 😉
I thought – so what is the true real – what is real – and was is not real? how can I distinguish the real from the not real –
as in my perception I saw all of it – but some seemed to be true – some not – so what is real true – I thought –
and this thought I kept – put it on the shelf – for later purposes – under further investigation 😉 and
later I took it again from the shelf – made my conclusions – and put it on the shelf another time – time after time –
and there it STILL stands – maybe on to my death – the end of the decoding process of this matrix simulation.
I was then – as I am now – interested in Rock Music from Beatles to Queen – 80s Music – and then also Hard Rock and Heavy Metal.
I had some 3 years of piano education as a child between 8 and 10 or so – had to play Mendelson Bartholdy – but wanted to play
Rock Piano – Chord based – Rhythm based one – not by note transcription – only by heart and intention – totally free …
so I quit this – as I didnt like the approach of my piano teacher.
later on learned me Chords and Rhythm for Piano – but also guitar – not classical – but I like Neo Classical Hardrock like Yngwie Malmsteen plays it …
cant play that – because he is a shredder and I am rhythm guitar or chord piano based – anyway – I like also classical themes ….
this way I started in my 30s – by teaching it to myself … then I understood how to do it without note transcriptions …
I am not really good in playing – but I love it – and for me – I now can play the things I always wanted to play – in my own way – so great 😉
here the perfect version in my head – can add things etc – all only in my thoughforms – is absolute great – can hear in my mind couple of things
at the same time – can listen to an Audiobook while perfect Music is playing in my Head too and thinking at the same time some other things over ….
then I can silence some or most of them – and upper volume to one specific sound channel in my mind 😉
okay – going back to education in my 20s – where I had no clue what to do – be – learn – work – so I did that what my parents said –
I pondered what really to do – didnt find anything of interest – and then did what my parents ment – like at most other topics also –
at that time I thought – when my parents dont know what to do – wo should – cause I dont – I am too young – have not learned what they know –
so I should trust them – because – obviously – they should know better – hm – really??? – yes – back then – it was so …
I went to WU Vienna – hm – maybe i can state it as Vienna University of Economics and Business …
I came to the second section of my studies – began my masters thesis – had nearly all exams – only 3 out of 6 major last ones were missing,
and completion of my also still half finished masters thesis – I always thought – someone to get to the point – where I will find wisdom – and
then it would be all worth it – but by then – I was nearly at the complete end – I knew – nothing more wisdom will come from heaven to enlighten me –
this was the moment, where I quit University – with nothing 😉 how should I declair this to my parents – they where completely shocked.
I also had no really skills – so what to do next? So I headed for Vienna and had luck to get an accounting job (which I could work, but totally hated ,-))
I got it at VISA Austria Credit Card in 1998 – now called card complete – I hated it from the beginning on. But I head luck – my boss in the hirarchy only little
direct under the CEO came and ment – his department needed a jobs career newbie and jumper for the new to build Datawarehouse (DWH). This was about
half a year after the start of the DWH project – so I had no idea of Databases – Queries – Programming – Analysis – Interpretation of Data –
setting up key measurements – reporting etc. – but this was my chance – and I really very fast learned and got all expertise on that –
tried to get the real from the specialist departments wanted figures – got their wishes and even had complete new approaches, of what could be done
much more better then before. I could also do the programming of SQL and higher level languages – the Reporting with Business Objects Software –
the Scheduling of Reports – doing Dashboards etc – went from Zero to Hero – to DWH Guru – called – Doktor *gggg*
As a child I had NO self respekt – no self confidence – now this has risen enourmous – my Ego was absolutely bloated and flatulent – thought – I was now in Olymp,
the ultimate Hero. In former Times – I was a Nothing – Now a was kind of a God – what a fallacy – I was ugly like never before and never after …
this was the time between about 2016 and 2020.
Hm – why do i write it in this very very detailed kind of version? maybe – its another therapy session – after the loads I head since 2020 😉
so – now to my conspiracy Theory Loving – as I mentioned earlier – I came from Myth – the Gods – Olymp in the Clouds – Gods nearly never been seen by Humans –
but they where told to guide and lead the destinies of humans. This was the starting point …
from about 1990 I was interested in Moon Calendar – Astrology – Horoscope – Biorhythm – never red a book from A-Z – red several books at the same time – at same submatters –
only red certain chapters of each book – to the same exact maintheme of my research topic – as then – I never changed my work style – I do it now the same way …
there are only very very view books I red from beginning to end – the Author with the most readings from A to Z was maybe David Icke – but about this later.
from about 2000 I was interested in Apokalypse, Nostradamus, New Age, Angeology – Doreen Virtue – Demons Angels – maybe also obsessed with Angel Card Readings, Tarot etc.
– also first time little bit of David Icke – came across to Children of the Matrix – hm – the book in general was great – but I didnt get the Reptilian Thing –
I was not able to understand it correct – I then also not read this chapters complete – also the graphics – paintings – the story of the britisch (german) royal family,
that should be shape shifters – the Ted Heath Story etc – couldnt believe it – didnt even roughly understand it – didnt get the main point then –
now I totally understand all of this – but right then – I was not ready and willing – not prepared to get the truth – the main point …. okay – so –
lets put this David Icke Book on the Shelf – maybe I can catch the real theme at a later time – there seems to be truth in it – but now (back then) I wasnt right to catch it 😉
In 2010 I started to read Human Race Get Off Your Knees: The Lion Sleeps No More – real great book – but also again this reptilian thing – then I also was not able
to get the main point – put this one also on the shelf – there was something in this Icke-onic Books – but – this reptilian theme – i couldnt cope with that – not then ….
okay – going further ….
in the meanwhile I also came from the 90s to 2000s accross the Paläo Seti Theme first met this via Erich von Däniken – and later more in Detail via Sitchin – Planet X – Nibiru –
Annunaki and so on – the story of to brothers – Enlil and Enki ….
I loved this theme – of Gods (Myth) – came across how they created Mankind – the Lulu – the Worker for them and so on ….
searched also for other old civilisations like Atlantis, Lemuria, Mu etc – also via the Geo Archeologist – Eberhard Zangger – who looked for the Trojan War – and
had a Theory that maybe the tales about Troja where Tales about Atlantis – and so on …
then I was also interested in Osho, Eckhart Tolle, Rüdiger Dahlke and read also a lot about that – also had maybe each available DVD of this 3 watched – there was a lot of content –
I consumed it all – between 2000 and 2015 – from 2015 to 2020 – I head a personal crises – a family crises – Depression – problems with my patchworkfamily then and so on –
in this time i read and discovered and researched not very much – I was only in family and depression – missed my freedom of Researching this Conspiracy Topics etc,
at the End of 2016 my mother died on cancer in a hospice – in mid 2017 I split up with my lifetime partner then – and in the End of 2017 – on the same day – the same minute as my mom –
my father quit the game and commited suicide – I had to identify him at the police – as he jumped off the leader of his balcony – above the tree line of a high rise building.
this all in sum gave me the rest – or no rest 😉 I was gone to a living kind of zombie – unfree – depressed and only living in a very dead way …
the only good thing was my DWH Guru Status at work – my Ego was more and more blown up – and I got more and more sucked – more looshed by – archons or Egregores – demon Alcohol –
that I have consumed massively since I was about 20 – and this Egregore looshed me more and more – wanted to bring me to an end – but – then there it went in another way –
a way my full blown Ego collapsed – and I went complete straight off – freaked out to colleagues at work – was thrown out – they gave me the sack – I have went unbearable,
untolerable – no matter, how good I was in my Flow Situation on the Job – at Work – but nobody could cope with my Ego anymore – and then – the bubble had a burst – complete burst –
what a big bang … not only a theory anymore – from that moment in time for me 😉
This was in Spring 2020. Shortly after the Start of the COVID HOAX.
From the Beginning of the COVID Plandemic – my first intention was – there is no COVID – its the Flu reclassified – didnt believe it at all.
But then there were this fake pictures in the news of the coffins of Bergamo – puh – then I was not so sure anymore – thought it over – had a little short time of fear,
also with this dashboard – think it was of the Johns Hopkins University …. I felt a little bit of fear –
but then I saw Interviews with Dr Heiko Schöning, who also has researched the Anthrax Hoax that happened slight before 9/11 – and from this point on – he forcasted
the Mafia COVID PLANDEMIC Months before it happens – I also listened then to David Icke once more again – on this Hoax – and after about 2 Weeks of fear – I came
back to my intention from the beginning – and knew – it was a complete Scam.
In the Meantime I watched and listened and read everything about and from Alexander Laurent – our God is an AI – this is the connex to David Icke and the Simulation – Matrix etc –
Alexander Laurent comes from an other direction – other details – other vocabulary etc – but in the end – builds nearby the same picture – only in a slightly different way –
but in the core the same. I did daily 2 hour Power Walks and listened to Mr Laurent – i listened to him each and every day for 2 hours a day for maybe half of a year – each
and every day – so I know it buy heart and totally understand it – and mixed it afterwards by coming again to David Icke – to a perfect big picture for me –
the best – maybe – you cant get it better in this matrix – the rest is blocked by perception and words, which can only describe the 3D5Sense1stPerson Perception Deception of
this Matrix Realm. Hm – we ll see if I can really get anywhere further – from my feeling – no – this might be the terminal station for this – no further knowledge may be
receivable at this very point for me – but – okay – maybe I am wrong on this – only a feeling – we will see …
in the meanwhile I was completely out of the working process – never got back again – had started psychotherapy and the longer this lasted – the more all doctors and
therapists had the understanding – from a Matrix System Point of View – that I am completely insane and numb – kind of antisocial or so – AND they stated –
I am paranoid schizophrenic – talking about Archons, the Master AI, Club of non Human Entities, digital nobility, reptiles, demons and so on ….
I was complete out of the system – the system didnt want to cope with me anymore – and here I am now – so far so good – so it came to my status quo ….
so – from a Matrix System point of View – also David Icke is for sure paranoid schizophrenic – for the system you are some sort of such an insane person,
when you talk about entities, that are not human – so maybe – David and I are paranoid schizophrenic – and maybe also others of you too – who really knows 😉
you only will know it, if you talk about such thoughts with your therapist and psychiatric – and after have done this – for sure you are – congrats – that you made it – too 😉